Jul 31
I Think I’m Living Office Space
I had really hoped this evening that I would be reading comments about a post I would have written this morning about all the things I’m doing with my site to get it ready for next month. But alas, work is eating me alive and I haven’t quite finished all the stuff I want to do on my blog.
And so instead of that post, you’re reading this one about how my life is mirroring Office Space.
Oh, it’s Bad
I’m a programmer at my day job. I guess that’s my first mistake.
I’ve been given a project to update that was started by a VP of my company who is not a programmer. As a result of this, the project’s code is scattered in 5 different locations and my lead told me last week not to bother the VP with questions essentially because he’s too important. The last couple of days my eyes have been glued to pages of code, bleeding with pain.
The World I Know
At lunch today I had to get out of the office so I sat in my car eating a Wendy’s Kids Meal - Because it’s cheap. And because it was really hot outside I sat in my car with the air conditioning on looking out at the world…A world that is passing me by. LATELY, I’ve been sitting at my cube for 8-9 hours a day while I know the outside world keeps moving. At lunch it’s funny, because even though I’m technically out of the office, it’s not like I’m really outside. It’s like I’m a dog on a chain. I can move away from the house, but it’s not like I can go swim in the lake.
I go back to work and there’s an e-mail telling all of us that there’s birthday cake in the kitchen. Boy, that’s grand.
A Vicious Cycle
Today I get home late (like yesterday) and my wife asks me why I’m not playing softball with my company’s team like I try every Tuesday. I explain to her that I’m up against a deadline tomorrow that I have no chance in hell of meeting, and couldn’t make the game. I find that after I spend an hour or two with my kid (the only good part of the day), I basically have to go to sleep so I can start this cycle over again tomorrow. The difference of tomorrow being it won’t be as good as today.
Everyday is worse than the day before it.
I have to make a change.
August 1st, 2007 at 12:42 am
Bush,
That’s rough–I’m really sorry to hear that. I owe you a response to your email, and I’ll get on that tomorrow probably.
In the meantime, the best thing I’ve written so far for someone in your situation is a post on staying motivated in a job you hate. There are a couple of tips there that should help you get through, but it’s certainly not easy or fun.
Keep on keepin’ on, my friend…
August 1st, 2007 at 12:44 am
Oops, tried to anchor a link to the text and either screwed it up or it’s not allowed on your site. I hate that–sorry.
If you’re interested, it’s at http://www.ihateyourjob.com/how-to-stay-motivated-in-a-job-you-hate-part-2-the-solution/
August 1st, 2007 at 12:52 am
Sorry to hear that - I have days like that too, but sometimes I like work too. I hope that things at work can start to look up.
August 1st, 2007 at 12:57 am
I feel for you! At least you still enjoying your little one :c). Chuck seems to have linked a great article for you! Also, you should take time for yourself. So please take a second for yourself to breath and think. /huggles
August 1st, 2007 at 5:59 am
At the moment I start writing this, above I see 4 “feel so sorry” comments.
Man, I dont feel sorry for you. Actually, I heel happy for you.
Don`t missunderstand me.
You`re doing what you`re doing for one of the bellow :
- you have to feed yourself and your family;
- you like programing.
Have you notice people around doing stuff you barelly have time to think about ? Do they do things you also dream to do but you have no time ?
Congrats, you are one step away from finding the key to solve your problems. Coz the main dificulty to solve a proble is to actually see what is the problem terms, needs, conditions.
Do this :
-get a hand allarm watch.
-program it to bell after 30 mins (while you`re at work, of course).
-when bells, don`t stop it, first write ONE WORD on a piece of papper next to you. What word ? The first one comes in your mind, being under pressure to STOP THE FUCKING ALLARM !
-reprogram the watch to bell after another half hour.
-repeat as above until you ent working time.
-before leave your office, fold the papper without reading it, write the date and put it in a draw.
-at the end of a working week, put the pappers (opened) one after one in front of you and see what word you`ll find there more often writen. That is what bother your inner space, your spirit.
-SOLVE THE ISSUE.
..
95% of people fauled to complete this test coz either they gave up before a week, either they read the papper at the day`s end, either they keep looking at the watch to see how much time is till allarm will bell.
FAQ :
q: What if I discover that the often written word(s) is related to my wife(husband) - family ?
a: Well, one thing is sure : life never take prisoners. There is only one thing one can do once is alive : to live the life till last day. Simple, complicated, painfully, happy, complaining, laughing, however, is a personal option. It`s called sometime karma.
..
Me, I would ask or eventually pay somebody to scratch VP`s car such way it will need re-paint. 4 flat tyres is another good option .. mwuahahahahaha
August 1st, 2007 at 8:17 am
@Chuck - I had actually read that post before. It’s really a good one!…I think what I’m going to do is use this as motivation. (#):)
@Danielle - Yeah, it goes back and forth. If I’m getting things done I’m usually happy but for some reason when I’m trying to get things done and I feel like people are stopping me…That just really makes me frown!
@Gnomey - I will breath, think….AND PLOT. And /huggles backatchya! (#);)
@Valentin - Very interesting technique and I appreciate the comment. Though I’m PRETTY sure I know what my problem is. Now I just have to FOLLOW THROUGH on the steps to resolve it. *nod*
And no way I would want the VP’s car to get keyed or anything! He’s actually a nice guy, just unfortunately in this situation not being terribly helpful to me or anyone else involved. Such is work. (#):)
August 1st, 2007 at 9:24 am
I can relate to you Bush, I’ve not been feeling very cheery about work lately and this is a job I used to really enjoy doing. I’m trying very hard to keep my eyes open for the positives in the situation. I wish I had some good advice to give you but unfortunately I’m in need of good advice myself. Time to read the article linked by Chuck.
August 1st, 2007 at 9:49 am
We all have those days I actually work for myself and at times I have those days. When I have those days (I’ve been having them the past few weeks), it inspires me even more to work harder to reach those goals. I’m starting to see results from all the hard work that I’ve been putting into my “other job” blog monetization.
I’m not working as hard with my main business because I’m past all that grunt work, mostly, and I’m doing very well. However, when I started I was working very hard.
True it’s for myself but I have even less free time now than I did working for someone else. With this new project, I work early in the morning until late at well after my daughter goes to be in the evening. I still have people thinking that since I’m a business owner I must have all the free time in the world, Ha! That keeps me laughing for days on end.
I’m working hard now so I won’t have to do it later.
August 1st, 2007 at 2:53 pm
@Peg - Sorry to hear it Peggy. Maybe we should start selling iPhones out of the back of our cars.
@Opal - “I’m working hard now so I won’t have to do it later”. I say that too. Hopefully one day it’ll pay off. *nod*
August 2nd, 2007 at 8:32 am
It will! Think positive. When you get down use that as an inspiration to do more to attain that goal. At times it will take a lot of sacrifice but in many cases it’s worth it.
August 2nd, 2007 at 8:54 am
@Opal - Absolutely!
August 2nd, 2007 at 5:21 pm
Hey Bush, I know what you mean. When your lead told you to avoid speaking to the VP — the very person who started the project it sounds like — is a sign of immaturity. He may be protecting him, but in actuality he’s ensuring the project’s failure, unless HE has all the answers.
You know better than anyone what needs to happen next, but maybe it’s time to at least “test the waters” by looking for a new opportunity. ;) Hang in there buddy!
August 2nd, 2007 at 10:39 pm
@Mark - Thanks for the support man! Yeah, I think he figured out that he was really dooming everything and eventually stormed the VP’s office to get some answers.
…Neither of us expected the VP to get up 5 minutes after, in the middle of my lead’s sentence and just walk out the office to talk to someone else.
My life really is a sitcom.