I had really hoped this evening that I would be reading comments about a post I would have written this morning about all the things I’m doing with my site to get it ready for next month. But alas, work is eating me alive and I haven’t quite finished all the stuff I want to do on my blog.
And so instead of that post, you’re reading this one about how my life is mirroring Office Space.
Oh, it’s Bad
I’m a programmer at my day job. I guess that’s my first mistake.
I’ve been given a project to update that was started by a VP of my company who is not a programmer. As a result of this, the project’s code is scattered in 5 different locations and my lead told me last week not to bother the VP with questions essentially because he’s too important. The last couple of days my eyes have been glued to pages of code, bleeding with pain.
The World I Know
At lunch today I had to get out of the office so I sat in my car eating a Wendy’s Kids Meal – Because it’s cheap. And because it was really hot outside I sat in my car with the air conditioning on looking out at the world…A world that is passing me by. LATELY, I’ve been sitting at my cube for 8-9 hours a day while I know the outside world keeps moving. At lunch it’s funny, because even though I’m technically out of the office, it’s not like I’m really outside. It’s like I’m a dog on a chain. I can move away from the house, but it’s not like I can go swim in the lake.
I go back to work and there’s an e-mail telling all of us that there’s birthday cake in the kitchen. Boy, that’s grand.
A Vicious Cycle
Today I get home late (like yesterday) and my wife asks me why I’m not playing softball with my company’s team like I try every Tuesday. I explain to her that I’m up against a deadline tomorrow that I have no chance in hell of meeting, and couldn’t make the game. I find that after I spend an hour or two with my kid (the only good part of the day), I basically have to go to sleep so I can start this cycle over again tomorrow. The difference of tomorrow being it won’t be as good as today.
Everyday is worse than the day before it.
I have to make a change.